An Open Letter To My Last Year Self

Dear Kaila, 

I know you how much you’re hurting and how desperate you are right now to be back on your feet. And I promise you that you will be but all of this is new and it’s a process that requires patience.

Proper healing takes time and movement so go ahead-
Sleepover Miji’s, facetime David, call James oppa, sit down with Janet unnie, and get coffee with Nicole. Make the effort to be around people and get used to crying in public, it’ll happen a lot but each time it does, you will feel a little better.

No matter what- don’t you dare call him.

Change to fresh sheets, buy some new clothes, and for fuck’s sake, Kaila, eat something, anything. Get your ass back on the road, you always found solace in running.
Don’t sign that 1-year gym contract; you’ll think that’s what you need but you’ll stop going after 4 sessions.

Again, don’t. you. dare. fucking. call. him. 

Stay strong.

God’s going to do a wonder with your full-time employment and you’ll be back in your favorite city.
Stay consistent. 2017 will be a rough start but you’re going to meet some amazing people. As you fill your days with new conversations to engage in and new places to explore, my darling, you’re going to soak it in like a summer hibiscus being rained on for the first time.

Just please, stay moving. The ground won’t ever feel stable if you refuse to get of our bed and walk on it.

You’re going to be okay.